For The Stay At Home Mom Who Is Angry All The Time: 5 Tips

Welcome to part 2 of what has unfortunately become my angry stay-at-home mom series. Ugh.

Part 1 of the series is all about Understanding Causes Of Mom Rage And Taking Back Control. I discuss what it’s like to experience mom rage and some of the ways I am dealing with emotional dysregulation. In this second post, I am sharing some additional tips I implement to manage overwhelming anger.

Simple strategies that are currently helping me keep my cool as a mom of 2 young kids are as follows;

1. ALWAYS have nutritious and delicious snacks on hand (for myself and my kids)
2. End the day with a fun family dance party
3. Visualize mom rage triggers sliding off my back – like water off a duck’s back
4. Embrace big-picture thinking
5. Keep a simple schedule

I do not want to be a stay-at-home mom who is angry all the time, so I have tested out a lot of different strategies and the above are my current go-to’s. I find myself much more relaxed and able to connect positively with my kids when I do these things.

Please note that what I share here comes from my personal experience as a mom and I am not a mental health professional. This post is for informational purposes only. If you are experiencing significant mental health struggles, I encourage you to contact your medical provider or a mental health professional. If in a mental health crisis, please seek emergency support.

How To Stop Being An Angry Mom: My 5 Simple Tips

1. ALWAYS Have Nutritious And Delicious Snacks On Hand

Being a mom of 2 young kids has been the best diet that I never wanted. The diet plan works like this; be so busy taking care of wild children that there is no time to eat.

This is not a great plan. Being hungry and tired is a huge trigger for my mom rage.

So, I have finally realized that on busy days, I need to have an arsenal of snacks to keep me going. If we are going to be out and about all day, then I’m packing an enormous bag of snacks, for me and my kids. 

2. End The Day With a Family Dance Party

A pre-bedtime dance party is becoming one of my favorite parts of our nighttime routine. Whether it was a great day or a mom rage-filled day, a fun dance party brings our family together in a positive way at the end of the day.

We love Danny-Go Dance Songs on YouTube!

I genuinely enjoy being silly and dancing every night with my kids and husband. It helps me connect with the joy of motherhood and being with my kids.

Plus, it helps me wiggle out some of the stress that has accumulated in my body throughout the day. It also helps my kids get their last wiggles out before bed!

3. Visualizing Mom Rage Triggers Sliding Off My Back

The phrase “like water off a duck’s back” refers to the idea that nothing is going to bother you much. All the frustrating stuff slides right off your back.

I think about this phrase daily when I’m struggling with mom rage and existing as a frustrated mother. When my kids are making endless demands and being extra feisty, I visualize a duck standing in a rain storm. As the rain continues to pound down on the duck, all the water droplets simply bead up and roll right off the duck.

Letting frustrations go like water off a duck’s back helps me see that my kids are simply being kids and having an off day. Their little brains have yet to mature and they will have their moments. If I can be with them as a calm mother through the storm, I can help them much better than if I am drowning in a flood.

Related: 10 Tips to Help Parents Handle Toddler Temper Tantrums

So, I love to harness the energy of the duck and its slick, no-stick feathers!

4. Keeping The Big Picture In Mind

One of my big mom rage triggers is when I have to ask my preschooler over and over to get dressed or brush his teeth so we can get out the door on time. How important is it really though, that we are always on time for every activity and event?

Of course, I want to teach him the importance of punctuality, but when it comes down to it, is being on time for everything really worth a mom rage episode? No way.

There’s a big wide world out there that does not care one bit whether or not we are 5 minutes late to preschool.

Big picture, managing my stress levels and mom rage is more important than getting to every activity on time with my young children.

I am learning to accept that sometimes it takes an extra 10 or 15 minutes to get out the door. I can either plan for this extra time, or I can be a little late. In time, I will not have to tell my child to go potty on repeat every time we need to leave the house.

5. Keeping a Simple Schedule

Lately, I have to remind myself that identifying my mom rage triggers is a fundamental part of managing mom rage. With this in mind, I realize that over-scheduling myself and my kids is a huge trigger for me. It creates extra stress and leaves me with fewer resources to regulate my emotions.

When we go from school to playdates to a bunch of different activities, it is simply too much. My husband and I do not have any extra help, and trying to go full-on every single day is just not feasible. I do not think it’s good for my kids either when they have so little downtime.

So I have been taking a step back and simplifying our schedules. This is a huge factor in keeping my mom rage at bay. Everyone operates in a more relaxed manner, and there is more room for me to connect with my kids in playful ways.

While I hate flaking out on plans, I realized that I would rather do that than be an angry mom all the time. That is not how I want my kids to know me.

What has been helping you manage your mom rage and/or mom frustrations? I would love to hear from you in the comments below!

Read about 20 Easy Ways A Stressed Mom Can Find Relief and Stay At Home Mom Burnout Signs and 10 Ways to Recover for more tips on maintaining motherhood wellness.