Mom Truth: Mama Bears Get It Done

I’m so grateful for my children. They have taught me, and continue to teach me many profound lessons.

Most recently, I am learning how to step into my full power as a mama bear. I’m learning to advocate for my children, and in turn, learning to advocate for myself.

The power of the mama bear is perhaps the greatest mom truth I have yet encountered on my motherhood journey. Without my kids, I would never have found the bravery to step into this eye-opening role.

Please note that this post is for informational purposes only and reflects my personal experience as a mom. Others may have different experiences and needs, and for individual questions and concerns please consult a trained mental health and/or medical professional.

What Does It Mean To Be A Mama Bear Advocate?

Advocacy is about standing up for someone or something. For moms, it means embracing our inner mama bear instincts and doing what we need to do to support our children. It means searching for answers to problems, and not giving up until there are answers. It means speaking up when a boundary is violated and needs protecting. It means being the leader that no one else is going to be.

It means forging a path that you believe will lead to the best results. It means doing your own research, seeking professional help and opinions when needed, and always holding onto hope that life can and will be better, for yourself and your children.

At thirty-eight years old, I feel like I’m finally learning what advocacy truly means and what it takes to be a powerful advocate. I thank my five-year-old for creating the space and motivation to learn this lesson.

Learning To Be An Advocate For My Children

I won’t go into the details, but in a nutshell, my five-year-old was/is struggling. As it became more and more apparent that the issue was not going away, I realized it was time for me to step up and do something about it.

I started doing my own research, held countless conversations with my husband, and finally sought professional help.

I went to my son’s pediatrician appointment with questions. I was prepared to get as much out of that appointment as possible. I guided the conversation and got answers to all of my questions.

It was the most productive and helpful appointment I have ever had at a doctor’s office. Historically, I have sat back and let a doctor do the guiding. My son’s appointment though, was too important for me to be passive. Mamas will do anything for their children.

After that appointment, I ended up needing the pediatrician’s help again, and I messaged her. I made my request and she helped. All of this was such a revelation and empowering experience for me as a mom.

Resources For Parents:

Child Mind Insitute shares a list of steps parents can take to advocate for their children’s mental health or learning needs.

Children’s Hospital Colorado also offers parents guidance on advocating for their children’s physical, mental, and emotional health in a wide range of settings and circumstances.

Self-Advocacy as a Mom

As all of this was happening with my son, I was also dealing with my own health challenges. For any mamas dealing with chronic issues, you know how extra exhausting it is to get through a day with two young kids.

So I was going to doctor and physical therapy appointments and doing my best to get what I needed. My approach, however, was vastly different from the one I took with my son.

I was passive. I was nervous around my providers. I was letting them guide the conversation. There were no answers.

What Happens When We Give Others All The Power: Nothing

I gave my doctors all the power to roll on through appointments offering the bare minimum and no real plan. Time and time again, I left appointments dissatisfied and demoralized. I felt like I was going in circles.

Finally, I decided to make my own plan. I was not going to sit around in pain and do nothing, just waiting for my next follow-up.

Forging My Own Path

I scheduled an appointment day of through ZoomCare. I went in with a plan and had what felt like my first productive doctor’s appointment in my entire life.

I loved the doctor I saw, and I feel like I at least have direction now. Maybe it will not end up being the right direction, but at least I’m trying something. I had forgotten that while doctors have training and knowledge that I certainly do not have, I am the one in charge of guiding my healthcare decisions.

Historically, I never would have made that Zoomcare appointment. I would have just given up on finding a solution. I’m not doing that anymore. I’m taking concrete steps, even if it’s all just trial and error, to get to a better place.

A Mom Truth To Hold Onto

Mom life is busy, exhausting, and stressful. It’s also the most beautiful and profound work I have ever done. And it has taught me lessons I would not have learned otherwise.

Related: Mom Burnout Recovery and Making Positive Changes, 20 Easy Ways a Stressed Mom Can Find Relief

I’m so grateful for my five-year-old. He is the reason I learned this lesson about advocacy; for others and myself.

Nobody is going to protect and support our kids the way we do as moms. And nobody is going to support us the way only we can as moms and individuals. Other people and helpers may be a crucial part of our support system, but ultimately, we are in charge of building that system.

A Promise to Be An Advocate For My Children and Myself

So from here on out, I am putting my children’s mental, physical, and emotional well-being, and my own, as an active priority. I will always fight for them and for myself. I will never stop searching for solutions to problems. If something is wrong, I’m going to take charge. Not in an overbearing helicopter mom kind of way, but in an intentional advocate role.

I want my children to see me in this kind of empowering role, so that they know that they too, can be an advocate for themselves and others as they grow up. They do not have to just stand by as a problem grows and creates struggle. They can step in and do something about it.

I can’t wait to learn the next lesson my kids have in store for me.

Here’s to finding a light at the end of the tunnel and standing up for our babies and ourselves, cheers!